"After you row your boat across the river, get out!"
Yesterday my husband John reminded of one of Byron Katie's best reminders to not only do out internal work but then to apply it to the way we live. It's one thing to discover our personal truths which range from how we feel about our current relationships to the way we cut our vegetables, but another thing entirely to make the changes that bring our insides in alignment with our outsides. Say you have been in therapy for years, talking about all the difficulties of your relationship with your mother, the demise of your marriage, all the choices you have made. And in the course of your work, you also find that you are in need of a career change, a major relocation, or just a few adjustments, but rather than making those changes, you stay in your little boat where you experience what is known to you. You know so well the comfort of your safe harbor, the grooves along the sides of the boat which are worn well over time. You identify with them. Looking outside of your boat you see sand which you have not walked on before- will it provide solid footing or will I sink as I walk? We can't know can we? But what we do know is that staying in our boats will not provide us with the opportunity to apply what we have learned about ourselves.