Health In Relationships: Evaluation

Evaluation

It is important to evaluate the first 3 components ongoing to determine if the relationship is functioning in a healthy way or if the form has become outdated. Use meditation and contemplation to reach a deeper understanding.

Purpose, Structure, and Implementation were the first 3 steps in the process of creating more health in our relationships. At the 4th or neutral step we can pause to evaluate what we have come to understand as true during the initial process before continuing.

Ask questions, gather information. The 4th step is an internal one and works well with writing and other processes which are self reflective. Sometimes it is necessary to return to the first step, identifying the purpose of the relationship, if this reflective process brings up more questions.

Questions: What have I learned so far?

Health in Relationships: Implementation

The 7 Components of Health in Relationships: Implementation

from a series of channeling sessions

The previous two steps in creating Health in Relationships explored what the purpose of the relationships were followed by a look at the structure of the relationships. Both of these processes were reflective and not action oriented and gave us an opportunity to study the relationship, gaining deeper understanding about it before actually "doing" anything about changing it if needed. This third step takes us into action where we might begin by playing out in our minds what the relationship would look and feel like were it in a different structure. Give yourself time here to play with the different options for you may decide the relationship is just fine in it's current form, or not.

Questions:

What does this relationship look like in the real world?

Do I need to make any changes? These can be as simple as adjustments.

Have I played with the changes in my mind? What would the relationship feel like if it were different?

Is this "right timing" for change?

artwork Blue Mandala

Health in Relationships: Structure

The 7 Components of Health in Relationships

from a series of channeling sessions

The next step in understanding our relationships is considering their structure. This process can include looking at the name we give them: Friend, partner, husband, wife, colleague, client, neighbor and many other identifiers which fit within social order. Each name also implies certain expectations of codes of behavior which we learn when we are children... "If you are my husband then you should act this way" or "If we are friends then I expect you to be there for me" are examples as are "Neighbors should get along" and "24 hour notice for a cancellation" for a client. There are many such "codes" and depending on the structure of a given relationship, expectations are often placed on the other person and, if the chosen structure isn't the best one, then disappointment ensues. It's the old "trying to put a square peg in a round hole" idea!

Questions:

*What is the Structure that best suits this relationship?

Be open minded when considering this question. Think of all options.

*In which direction is there natural flow of energy? Lovers, friends,working mates? Don’t try to force the structure to meet what you think you want.

*How does the other person see the relationship? Is it the same as the way you perceive it?

Health in Relationships: Purpose

7 Components of Health in Relationships

from a series of channeling sessions

Most of us will experience many relationships throughout the course of our lives including with our parents, siblings, neighbors, friends, lovers, children, teachers, and coworkers.Understanding that some of these relationships may be enduring throughout our lives while others are short term can help us embrace change that is a natural part of life. We will have relationships that help us evolve during key times in our lives only to change and become less important as we continue down the path. The following is the first of seven excerpts from a channeling process with Michael that may help us identify which relationships are current and healthy.

Purpose

Define and Understand the purpose of the relationship. Is it current?

It is helpful to be neutral during the examination of the relationship in order to avoid exaggeration of relevance and importance.

Questions:

What are we learning together?

How much energy is there?

Does the other person participate fully or is there resistance?

Does the relationship increase or decrease my energy and focus?

Is the relationship growing as we each learn?

artwork by Daniel Holeman www.awakenvisions.com

Thoughts from the Sea

"One learns to accept the fact that no permanent return is possible to an old form of relationship; and, more deeply still, that there is no holding of a relationship to a single form. This is not tragedy but part of the ever-recurrent miracle of life and growth. All living relationships are in process of change, of expansion, and must perpetually be building themselves into new forms. But there is no single fixed form to express each changing relationship. There are perhaps different forms for each successive stage; different shells I might put in a row on my desk to suggest the different stages of marriage- or indeed of any relationship...."
from Gift from the Sea by Anne Morrow Lindbergh


The Universe is constantly creating and changing, bringing new forms
into being just as old ones pass away. Birth, life, decay, death, rebirth.

Curiosity * Openness * Awareness * Grace

Remaining present to what is occurring while being open to what may unfold without attachment or the need to direct the course of events gives us all the opportunity for true joy. What a delight!

Question: What surprises are here for me today?




*photo courtesy of Photostock